Marriage, Mothering, and Multi-Tasking

About 4 months ago, I began a whirlwind of activity, the major highlight of which was summer nuptials to the man of my dreams. My birthday was June 14, our fantasmagical union of awesomeness was June 15th, my summer trip to New York for a summer acting program was a few weeks later and lasted for a whole month, and then almost as soon as I got home I ran off to begin my final semester of my undergrad!

I suddenly have several roles in life - student, mother, wife - what a change in a few short months. I thought I would share some things I'm learning along the way =)

First of all, being a student is fantastic (now that I see a light at the end of this tunnel!). God has brought me so far over the past 9 years. Sometimes I look back and think "wow that is a LONG time in between the beginning of school and the end of school." But even after I diverted from the plan, and made my foolish decisions, God had his grand plan and lovingly restored me. After 4 years of wandering, he set me back on track and 2 1/2 years later here I am with graduation in sight! When I began my undergrad I wasn't focused and the end result didn't mean so much to me as it does now. I always thought graduations were boring on top of it all, so I certainly never wanted to walk. Now however, after all this effort, my attitude has changed to "um YES I'll walk - I'm proud of what I have accomplished and I'm going to spend 3 hours on December 14th celebrating it!"

Now that I'm also in a Mom role, I felt like it was an important step for me to model finishing something proudly. Speaking of mothering - what an interesting role in life. Boy do you learn a lot when your life is an example to another. My mindset has completely changed. It wasn't an immediate change since the day I got married, but it has been a progression of changes since I met my husband and son 2 years ago. Now, I am constantly thinking about how to train his little mind to be positive, to make the  right decisions, etc etc....of course what you don't realize, at first anyway, is how much they change YOU. For one thing, you have to be way less selfish. And boy do they catch you in the little things!  Suddenly, you hear yourself saying things like "Are you getting enough air back there[in the car]?" "better grab your sweatshirt!" "stop chewing with your mouth open and banging your bowl" "stop wiping your hands on your tshirt!!" "how was school today, what did you learn?"

I'm learning (my husband seems to be a pro already) when to let things go, and when to give the little human a 15 minute life speech about morality/ethics...or whatever the issue might be. But while all this is going on, I'm constantly reminded how special he is, how precious his little mind is, how smart he is and how valuable our time together is. I am truly blessed in the family I now have. I try to remember to hug him, tell him I'm proud of him, encourage him, leave love notes around the house and we are constantly trying to help him think positive thoughts. In reward, I get to live with a happy healthy little rascal that has an extreme amount of energy, intelligence and love, and comes at me every few days with some of the nicest comments that make all of the efforts and the learning so worth while :)

Marriage is way cool. I have to say it's even better than I anticipated, which says a lot seeing that I am a true believer in romance and fairytales. Because of the lessons God took the time to teach both of us before we met, my husband I really value and respect each other and we try to show each other tangibly and on a daily basis. I know some may say we are still in the "honeymoon phase" but really, our entire relationship has been like this. We try hard to let each other know how much we appreciate the other. I heard once that marriage is not 50/50, its 100/100 so that when one partner isn't at their 100%, the other can cover you. I have found that to be so true. My husband is the most thoughtful man you could possible meet. He gets up much earlier than I do and he does his best to be quiet - to the point of putting his clothes in the bathroom the night before so he doesn't wake me up while looking for things. I often wake up, start getting ready and in he comes with a cup of coffee. It's not a rare occurrence either that I might then walk downstairs to a note that he has left me saying how much he loves me. Lucky ME!!

Now, do we disagree on things? Sure we do. I will say however, it's not often, and it's not usually about anything very important. On top of that if it goes past 5 minutes or so it's usually because one of us is tired.

I am loving every minute of  this new life God has blessed me with. What a cool thing marriage is. When it is done right (and I can say that because I have done it "wrong" before) what an amazing partnership! I feel secure, happy, content, excited, loved, full, supported and encouraged.

Now that I have a taste for what this is like, I just want to keep pouring into his love tank as much as I can to keep this cycle going! I have no doubt we will be happy forever and I can't wait to spend the next quadrillion years together =)
K.T.Comment